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1. Don't ask us, "What are you thinking about?"

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Unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as:

• Sex: Frankly, like an animal.
• Cars: How great mine feels to drive, how they look, how to make them look a little better or how to get 20 more horsepower
• Benefits and problems of a recent rule change or phenomenal strategy in the sport we follow
• Strategies for getting to the next level on our current Video Game Obsession
• How great a steak would taste right now.

Corollary

1. If you ask a question but you are not sure you want to hear the answer, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

Corollary

1. If the answer could be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, we meant it the other way.

Corollary

1. When we ask you, "What's wrong?" If you reply, "Nothing." We will act like nothing is wrong. We can tell you are lying but pursuing the issue is difficult, will not end well and you just gave us social permission to ignore it by stating, "Nothing" is wrong.

Tags: lists

This morning, while we prepared for the day, my wife exclaimed, "calla lilies!"

I am not sure why calla lilies were the top solution on her very busy brain, but we needed calla lilies for the basket above the bathroom cabinet. It was not the big business problems that would face her in less than an hour. It was not the papers, case studies and other projects needed to obtain a Master's degree. It was the emptiness in the basket above our heads.

Man Rule:

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1. There are two kinds of flowers in the flower shop: roses and bunches.

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What the hell is a calla lily?

We discussed the "other" flowers that I might find at flower shop. She mentioned Orchids, which I knew by name and price tag.

"Three! Three magnificent types of flowers! Ha, Ha Ha, Ha!"

Tags: lists